Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
