Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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