I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
