Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Is it penis luge time yet?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize