oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
