This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
