Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
