Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
