i need an iv and a liver transplant
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
