shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Randomize
