hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
