i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
