I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize