I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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