The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
