: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
why didn't you poke me back
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
