Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
How external is "for external use only"?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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