I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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