is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
