i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
