You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
