I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Randomize