What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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