those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize