weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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