i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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