Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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