Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
