we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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