I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
