Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
