lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
