You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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