Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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