I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
soo... how was my night?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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