you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
