he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
