I'm jealous of your bromance
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize