you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
