We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize