Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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