We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize