remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
