its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
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