I want to stick my p in your. b.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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