It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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