Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize