your parents love me but you hate me
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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