EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
