i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
