Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize