I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
This is classic penis vs brain.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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